Kicking the Dog

PETA members:  I did not kick my dog.  Chill.

Do you ever wonder why you lash out at those closest to you - the loves of your life - but to almost complete strangers, you are friendly enough to make a Care Bear throw up?   Why is that?  Why do we feel as though it's okay to skip the good manners when it comes to our spouse, our siblings, our kids?  I don't think anyone does it intentionally - not those with good intent, anyway.  But we do it.  We show our crankiness to our wife, but brighten up with a smile and a "How's it going, my friend?" to a person we met just last week.  Behavior like that seems to fit the definition of "crazy".

I'm pretty sure a licensed psychotherapist would say that it has to do with comfort - with a warm and fuzzy that this person will always be here, so - like the dog - you can feel free to kick it when you feel like kicking something.  Not cool.  But as you read this, you can likely think of a handful of times where you've been guilty of this act of insensitivity and self-centeredness.  I know I can - that's why I'm covering this topic today. 

I've been writing about "thoughtfulness" and "giving" so far for obvious reasons.  But thoughtfulness should extend to our daily interactions with our immediate family, our best friends, and our relatives, too.  I know - you're thinking:  "Duh, Greg.  Obvious.  Why don't you remind us to breath?"  And maybe I'm alone in my imperfection, but I'm guessing not.  I think we can all improve in that area.  Thoughtfulness starts from the roots.  If one is less than courteous to his own family, but friendly to outsiders ... seems a tad hypocritical, doesn't it?  Why can we "turn it on" with strangers and acquaintances, but we can't be bothered with the effort for our husband/wife or sister?

Here's my message - to me, to you, to all:  Let's cut it out.  Take a stand against the little brat inside you and be aware of how you're talking to and treating your loved ones.  You may be tired, or mad at your boss, or upset about the guy who cut you off in traffic, but the pillow to punch is not your immediate loved ones.  Choose to be kind and thoughtful to them first and foremost.  Blow it off, or get an actual punching bag (not a metaphorical one ... and, as mentioned, certainly not the dog).  And with this change in your actions, watch for the ripple effect.  Taking the other fork in the road will change your and their whole day, week, year ...

Stepping off of my soap box now.

Go sign up for HowGiving - if not for you and those you care about, do it for those you'll benefit through using the service:  the sick, the impoverished, the hungry, the down-hearted.  Quite frankly, HowGiving is not about you or me.  It's about putting others first by automating your good will and intent. 

Now go pet the dog.  Word to your respective Mothers.

For more information about the HowGiving service, go to http://howgiving.com.